I Look Like Shit Today? Tell me What You Really Think....

So, I came into work on Friday and my boss asked me if I had stayed up all night. I said no, and he proceeded to tell me that I looked like shit. I told him the only difference was that I didn't have on any make up, but that I often do not wear make up to work. He told me that he felt he needed to "clear the air" and "get it out"..... first off, that is an opinion, and secondly, I could have gone the whole day without having heard what he has to say in regards to my appearance.

I should have just told him to quit being mad that I won't let him fuck me like he wants and to just get over it, or that he is ugly everyday, but I figured it caused less harm to just keep my mouth shut. Perhaps I am leading, and he should follow my example. That is like telling someone they look fat when they didn't even ask you if they did. What the fuck?!?!

I should have known he was shallow when I met him, seeing as how he wanted a picture sent along with my resume, but if you aren't a model, don't expect one!!!

There is Always a Douche at Each Job

So I like my job for the most part, but there is one prick (sitting next to me at the moment) who gets on my last fucking nerve. He may be a nice guy outside of work, but some people are just not work compatible. More on this later. I think he is watching me........

OK, so today he was fine but let us back track a bit........

(insert twilight zone music here)

Yesterday when I got to work my boss asked what I had said to Ugly Metal Band Coworker about my pay checks. The thing is, he asked me why I had 2 checks, obviously in my business, which to me was a little too close for comfort. This had happened Friday, so Monday my boss asked me this and I told him the situation. I told him that Ugly Metal Band Coworker had asked me about my pay, and I told him. I felt uncomfortable doing this, but at the same time I didn't want to lie. I should have just told him that was none of his business and that be the end of it, but I didn't want to be rude.

For the most part, people in my position work on only a salary until their probation is up. I on the other hand, was an exception. I am receiving a base plus a commission and this made Ugly Metal Band Coworker unhappy. I can not help that I have been in the car business for a while and I cannot go back in time to amend his original offer. He agreed to the terms of his employment. I guess I am just a better negotiator.

I thought it was odd that my boss was even approaching me with asking what went down, because I have never been in a job where people have the nerve to ask what I make and then proceed to take it to my boss. Suck it up and go on with your life! When my boss asked me, I relayed verbatim the conversation between Ugly Metal Band Coworker and myself and the proceeded to tell my boss that it was unprofessional to begin with and that I could not even begin to fathom why it was being brought up again.

Work ends and I drive home....

Phone rings.

I answer and it is my boss calling. He told me that he had laid it down to Ugly Metal Band Coworker and that he was impressed with my performance at work. We get off the phone and that was it.

I get to work today and Ugly Metal Band Coworker and I get along just fine and he was actually quite conversational today. I guess my boss did more than just telling him to mind his own business. Whatever he did it worked for at least a day. Hopefully it was a consistent talking to. More on THAT later.

Too Tired to Think

I know that I have left some of you hanging, but this new job is kicking my ass. I do not mean literally, but waking up at 5:30 is so hard as it is, and when I get home, I am pooped. I promise to write something substantial tomorrow. Perhaps a blog of the commercial or the "real" reason I am in New Jersey, according to the owner of my job. Interested anyone? Sleepy time, but definitely more on both topics.

Thanks for keeping up, I promise to get better once I get adjusted 100%, but definitely tomorrow!

First Day at the New Job

So I started my new job today. It was a little boring because I am being trained so things were going slow and we had to take breaks whenever my boss was interrupted, but for the most part is was pretty cool. Everyone was very friendly, and we all sat down together for lunch. The town I work in is very small, and because of the town's ordinances, everyone brings their own lunch, or they go down to the local grocery store to purchase salads a la carte, sandwiches, or the daily soup special. My mom made my lunch for me. She had called while I was out at Sweet Charity and Nanny Mongo 911's house and asked what I wanted. This is the life. I can't remember the last time my mom packed my lunch for me, but I can hardly remember living at home last too. It does have it's perks though, because there was no way in hell I was attempting to make my bed at 5 o'something this morning, but when I got home, mom had done it for me. I don't want to get used to it though. She asked me the other day if I wanted her to wash my clothes. I said no. I ended up washing mine and hers (+ a dad and the kids). I would rather not loose touch of all the things I have been doing for the 8 years away from home.

Back to the job......

I felt like I was in Pre-K all over again. I got to color with 3 colors. Yellow, green, and pink. It was fun! I am only joking. I did color, but it was a very useful way my boss did things to determine whether or not cars have been assigned, whether or not they were finished, and if they were staying over night. I did as he put it "bust his chops" about it, but it was indeed a very efficient way of going about things.

I hope that this is the job I am going to stay in for a while. Everyone there seems to really like it. The other people in my position have been there 1) 2 years, and 2) 6 years, so someone must be doing something right. The thing is, I was put in to take someone else's spot, while the other in the same spot moves up, and the service manager we currently have goes to the sister dealership to do the same thing for more money.

I must admit I like how they move up within the company instead of hiring in. That way I know that if I stick with it, I can make the most potential money possible and work my way all the way to the top. Besides the guy in my position was telling me how to go about filing single 0 on my tax form rather than single 1 because apparently we make too much money and if we file single 1, we end up owing a few grand to the government when tax season come back around. Glad someone filled me in on that!

Well, I am tired and I need to get cleaned up for tomorrow. Today was a good day, and hopefully tomorrow will be even better.

Just for the record, I made my lunch for tomorrow......

Plotting on PT Shmoozer

This is my last week of work, and for the most part everyone has been pretty easy to get along with, except PT Shmoozer. Ever since Monday she has needed a priest to hold an exorcism in her honor. With a 360 degree turn of her neck, I knew it was on. For some reason she is an unhappy person and tends to come off that way to everyone else, causing her to be disliked by the majority of the staff. I have had a not so pleasant exchange of words with her since Monday. When my boss got into the office on Monday, he asked me to inquire with PT Shmoozer regarding some overtime I worked the previous Friday. I asked her if that was going to be paid in addition to my normal pay check Tuesday the 1st, or if she was planning on waiting until Friday to cut that check. Her response was unsatisfactory, and I made it known to those in authoritative positions. She said that because I had taken off for 420 when my friends were in town, that my 6 1/2 hours of overtime would pretty much cover the day I missed work. This was unacceptable. I have been working with this company for 6 months, and of that 6 months, the owner, the general manager, and my boss knew about me taking 420 off 2 months in advance. This day was approved and signed to be a paid day out. PT Shmoozer informs me that an employee doesn't acquire any paid time off until the year anniversary of their start date, but seeing as how the company failed to give me anything in writing or an employee handbook all this was up in the air. I have been told 2 different things at this point. I had been told 1) that employees get one week vacation their first year, and I have been told 2) an employee gets one week vacation after they have been there one year. The problem stems from the lack of organization and the lack of professionalism in this company. First off, in order to enforce these rules and policies, they must provide adequate paperwork to their employees, otherwise how is a person to know? Secondly, had I called in sick I would have received a paid sick day, but PT Shmoozer was trying to dock me a days pay for something I had given over 2 month notice; I think not. I of course raised hell to my boss and the general manager. I was told by the GM to wait until Friday and it would be resolved. I was not going to do this. I hardly think that anyone is going to be willing to help me on my last day, much less have to track down money owed to me on my last day. I also do not think I should have to wait until my last day seeing as how the pay period had ended and that day was part of that particular pay period. I refused to hear anything else; I was to be paid that day, and that was final. Well, all day we were back and forth with PT Shmoozer, with the GM and my boss on my side. At 4:30 yesterday afternoon I went to her desk, asked if my check was ready and she said "No". I walked into my boss' office and told him that if she didn't pay me, I was going to stand there until she did, and that I wasn't lifting a finger to do any work until I was paid for my time. I go back to her desk at 5:00 when I am heading out to go home. The check was still not issued. I walk into my Italian Long-Lunch's office again and tell him I am not leaving until this was fixed. In the hallway, the GM comes to me and hands me a personal check out of he and his wife's personal account. I told him I was not going to take his money that PT Shmoozer can write me a check, and then, just then, the bitch says "Here is your check". I wanted to punch that bitch in the face; Matter of fact that is the plan for Friday when I leave the establishment for good. I may also post a few advertisements on sites for casual sexual encounters and spam stuff to be received in her inbox.

Pigs in the Workplace

Due to the recent unemployment of The Fraudulent Christian, I had to assist PT Shmoozer with answering the phones while she went to lunch. It just so happens that Houston law enforcement shows during this time. They had initially asked me where the owner was. The owner had walked out about 30 minutes prior to their arrival. They ask for the next in charge. That would be the GM, but he is out until 4/30 on a vacation. They proceed to ask me for the next in line; which just so happens to be PT Shmoozer, and she too was out to lunch. They then ask us if a fire were to occur, how would we direct everyone out seeing that no one of authority was in the establishment. The police, or as I would like to call them Hooskin Haters, start asking me and Girly Boy about licenses. I was not sure what licenses they were speaking of, and Girly Boy directs them to a pin board located behind PT Shmoozer's door. I asked the Hooskin Haters if that was sufficient and they said no, so I decided to ring PT Shmoozer on her mobile phone. PT Shmoozer drags her saggy ass back to work, and at this point the Hooskin Haters were rummaging about things in the office as if they owned the place. The Hooskin Haters are then directed to the only 2 salesmen we have. They ask them about their licenses to sell cars. They inform us that according to their records we are selling cars illegally. I imagine things went fairly well with them after that, because I walked out for a smoke, and when I returned, they had left. The Hooskin Haters tell the people in the front that we, Girly Boy and myself refused to tell them the owners name. That was a crock, had they asked for it, they would have received it. I wasn't offering the information, but if they wanted it they could have asked. Police get on my damn nerves sometimes. Why would they say to their superior on the phone that I refused to give them the owner's name? Fucking pigs!!!

Someone Got Canned!!!

It was only a matter of time before The Fraudulent Christian was going to be let go. That just so happened to be yesterday. Like the dumb ass she is, she went to the GM and told him her probationary period was coming to an end, and asked him if they had any intentions of keeping her. He said no. I guess she then told him that she would work until the end of the pay period, which is Monday. I guess that didn't go so well. She is not here today, so I imagine her asking made the process go much quicker than she had anticipated. She had the audacity to go to my boss yesterday and ask if she could take my position once I left. My boss told me this and said that he would quit if they put her in my spot. It is nice to be loved and appreciated. I can honestly say that he is the coolest boss here, even though his lunchtime habits tend to piss me the fuck off. They seriously need to hire someone else. They are still behind on employees. They have yet to fill the receptionist position and Fuzzy McCootersnatch left a while ago. Now, they have to fill the accounts payable position because The Fraudulent Christian got the can, and as of next Friday, I will be out of here and my seat will be empty. I know that working in the front is not easy. It isn't the work that is difficult, but the lady at the front that has been there 26 years is a bitch; I'll call her PT Shmoozer (she drives an ugly PT Cruiser). It is hard for anyone to stay in accounts payable with PT Shmoozer. She is hard to work for and never satisfied with anyone. It seems that no one ever makes it past their probationary period. I guess that is because even though they are short on staff, they would rather not invest in someone and offer them the few dinky benefits they have available here. I can honestly say I saw it coming; I just can't believe the idiot initialized her own termination. That reminds me of the movie Friday, where the guy gets fired on his day off. That shit doesn't happen everyday!!!

The Fraudulent Christian

I work with a woman that calls herself a Christian. She always goes on about how she never says mean things about people and how she prays for people with ugly souls. This bitch is crazy. First off, she DOES talk bad about people. She got Fuzzy McCootersnatch and I in an argument a while back because she opens her mouth when it is not necessary. Secondly, the woman is married. Not only is The Fraudulent Christian married, but she lives with another man. She lives with the father of her child. So, let's catch up before we go any further.

1) There is a woman
2) She claims to be a Christian
3) She talks bad about people
4) She is married to a man she does not live with
5) She lives with another man other than her husband

Let us continue shall we? Well, on top of all this, she is a slut bag. She is sleeping with one of the guys at work that is also married. She is unaware of the widespread knowledge people have of this, but it is certainly very obvious. She leaves for lunch, his truck follows, she returns from lunch, his truck follows, and when she leaves for the day, he is right behind her. I wasn't aware that devout Christians are home wreckers too. I guess that was not in the part of the Bible I have ever read. The thing is, don't preach about how holy you are, when you aren't. Let's add to our list shall we?

6) She is sleeping with a married man
7) The married man she is sleeping with works with us

Moving on...... Recently before Fuzzy McCootersnatch left us to go to The Bike Rally, The Fraudulent Christian asked her for help in setting up a profile on Match.com. I guess her free trial was over and she went on to what she had free reign over. This lady is also not attractive. She is 50, or approaching 50, dresses like she is 20, and looks pregnant with triplets. How is that for a visual?

There are more interesting tid bits about The Fraudulent Christian. Not very long ago she was telling Fuzzy McCootersnatch and I about an issue she has with puss in her urine. She stated that it was a Urinary Track Infection, and claimed she didn't sleep around, but at this point that is all up in the air. After all, does a devout Christian woman get involved with a happily married man that has 2 children?

One day she arrives to work, goes upstairs and there was no coffee made. She tells Pirate Pants to make her some coffee. Pirate Pants has been working here for 26 years, he came over with the owner, so she was wrong for asking him to make her some coffee. Luckily he didn't. He informed her that anyone wanting coffee was responsible for making it themselves. She of course waited for the cleaning lady to arrive and told her to make her some coffee. She claimed she didn't know how to make it. Well, business coffee makers usually have prepacked coffee, as we do, and a button on the machine that says "start" or "brew". Fucking idiot!!!

Then, last week, she must have cut herself with some paper or something so she gets on the intercom and calls one of the parts guys to the front desk. He was unavailable, so another parts guy comes to the counter. He asked what she needed and she told him she needed Breakfast Taco Runner to go and get her a band-aid. Well, this was also a do-it-yourself type thing like the coffee. You need a band-aid, get it yourself. The parts guy told her this and she said, "I'll wait until he isn't busy, I don't feel like walking all the way over there." Bitch, with your fat, pregnant, triplet looking ass you could use to walk up a few steps!!

Tell me after all this that this lady is a good Christian woman. She is a lunatic!!!

Italian Long-Lunch, you are a DICK!

I must start by saying that I am ready to get out of this job and into the groove of my new one to come. My boss, Italian Long-Lunch left for lunch at 12:30 this afternoon. Guess what time he came back? Just guess. 2:45. The fucking asshole took 2 hours and 15 fucking minutes for lunch knowing that I had not yet eaten and that I would have to wait for him to return prior to my leaving for lunch.

Can it be May 7th already?

Then, on top of this all, he doesn't tell me he had returned from lunch. I just so happen to walk past his office to see him sitting there. I look at him as if my eyes were about to pop out of their socket. He looks at me like a lunatic and asks me why I hadn't left yet. Why? Because your dumb fucking ignorant Italian ass never fucking told me you were back. He is fully aware that I cannot leave without him here. How would I have known to leave if he didn't tell me? What a fucking bastard.

I am counting down the days.... 19 more to go. 19.

I leave, and in doing so pick up the phone and call my mother, Spanish Fly. She says I should complain. Well should I? What will it accomplish? Maybe the other idiots we work with are oblivious to how long a lunch this fucking douche is actually taking.

Just breathe, Pissed off, just breathe.

I have had it with this company. The thing that no one realizes here is that I have to wait for my boss to return from lunch before I go. No one else has to do that lunch coordination bullshit.

Where are my nun chucks when I need them?

I am about to say something, because if I don't I fear for the safety of these people around me. I won't do what psycho did at Virginia Tech, but I will have a bitch slapping party where all these fuck faces are invited.

Don't these bitches know I am crazy?

Good Friday: In God we Trust

I work in an Italian company, where most people are predominately Catholic, myself included, but we do not have Good Friday off like most companies. When I asked if we had Friday off, the technicians started laughing. I was told by the Italian-Venezuelan that our company is only religious when it comes to the dollar bill. The dollar bill states "In God We Trust", but for this company, "When there is money, we work." I was also told by the techs that the owner once made people come in on Christmas and New Years one year because someone had asked if they were getting off early on Christmas Eve. Apparently if upset him for someone to ask "such a ridiculous question." Not only are we working today, but tomorrow as well. Saturdays is the slowest of all days and there is really no point in being open, but We only get Easter Sunday off because we don't work Sundays and he doesn't have to pay us. I think it is somewhat odd, because the main company located in NJ is off today, all weekend, and Monday. I am not too concerned because I do not anticipate being here much longer. I received an email yesterday with my job offer in writing. I just need to book the flight!

Uninvolved: Tired of the drama

So, I talked to Fuzzy McCootersnatch today. I don't want to be mad at her anymore. I think I let things get to me that I just blow up, and other people that interfere don't make the situation any better. I don't mind my job. What does bother me, is that people are so consumed in every one's business, and it drives me nuts. It is so hard to keep up with all the bullshit, so why even let it get to me? Fuzzy McCootersnatch was the first person I connected to here, and I don't think things she may have said or done were intentionally done maliciously. She is a good person deep down, and as far as giving a damn about anyone here, she is the one that I actually care about. If I didn't care about her like this, I wouldn't get upset, or bothered, or enraged that I felt betrayed by her. She didn't even go to the party that was held by Jugs on Saturday. All this stink and no reason for it. I get my feelings hurt quite a bit, and honestly, why would I want to be somewhere when people don't want me there? I am tired of the drama. I just want to be happy. I just want other people to be happy, and I don't want people to pretend that they are here for me when they aren't. There is no need for that. I don't want to waste my time with someone if they really don't want to be friends with me. There is too much time for those that do, so why let it get to me? When times are rough, you know who your friends are. No matter how big or small an argument is, we all come around if we are both in the same place, and we both care. Like I said before, I don't want to be mad at her, because she is better than the rest of these douche nards.

I am not a piece of ass

So Friday night I went to sing karaoke with some of my friends. I ended up getting drunk and having a good time. A friend from work, Puerto Rican ended up calling me, so I had invited him to join in the singing and festivities. When I wanted to leave, he walked outside with me and suggested we go to his house. I was not interested in going to his house. I was drunk, tired, and wanted to go home. I asked him why he wanted to go to his house so bad, and he replied "so I can get some condoms." First off, he has a girlfriend. Secondly, I had no way implied that I would be taking him home with me to let him 'have his way with me'. I was drunk, but not that drunk. I thought I made that quite clear. He seemed to understand, but asked if he could follow me home. I guess he was worried about me getting home safely, or made it sound that way at any rate. We get to my house safely, and my phone rings. I answer it, it is Eggland's Best calling to come over. This pissed off Puerto Rican, because he walked out the door and drove off. I don't understand where he gets off thinking I am going to sleep with him. I was pissed, especially because I have been seeing Eggland's Best, and that is it. I called Puerto Rican on Saturday to give him the benefit of the doubt. I asked him why he stormed off, he was mad that I answered my phone when Eggland's Best rang. He also said that he didn't want to be friends with me. I guess this is because I didn't put out. That is insane. He needs to go call his girlfriend for that, I am not the work whore. I shouldn't have to sleep with someone to maintain a friendship with them, that is ridiculous. This is the place I work at. I shouldn't have to feel like I am in a day care center all day, and when it is time to get off, mommy is here to pick me up. For the love of God, I am not just a piece of ass. I have substance, and worth. Fuck you for thinking you could get in so easily, and Fuck you for giving into the stereotype of douche bag, ass hat men; boys for that matter.

Get off your high horse

I don't know what is in the air today, but everyone is in a pissy mood, myself included. First off, my boss, Italian Long-Lunch isn't gone by 12 which upsets me because I had made arrangements to meet Bobbies McBrune for lunch at 1:30. We had decided to go to Chipolte, a restaurant owned and operated by McDonald's, because they were able to tend to my "no meat on Friday" needs. I informed Fuzzy McCootersnatch of the plans in case she was interested in joining Boobies and myself. At some point between me telling her where I was going and me actually walking out the building shit hit the fan. I have been trying to go and eat with her seeing as how next week will be her last, but I will not tolerate someone being rude to me for no reason. This is not the first time she has gotten this attitude with me. Last time she hung the phone up on me when I merely asked her what was wrong. I DO NOT tolerate being hung up on, and for me to even put that behind me and initialize conversation with her after a few day cooling off period, is a big deal. This time, UNACCEPTABLE. She told Mr. Match.com that she would get him lunch when she went out. I guess that she somehow forgot about Chipolte plans and told him she would go to the French House. The French House is a bistro like place that doesn't really cater to people "not eating meat on Friday." I guess that just slipped her mind. The thing that bothers me the most is that I often wait to go to lunch late so we can go together (instead of going at the butt crack of dawn), and for her to act this way is so disrespectful and selfish. I guess I shouldn't care that she is leaving. It seems to me that she isn't being the friend she claims to be. Maybe I was mistaken. If she didn't want to go where I was going that is one thing, but for her to cop this attitude with me and go off, is another. If she thinks she can come to me with that, she doesn't know me very well. She better be glad that she didn't get punched in the fucking face. Fuzzy, you know who you are, and I think you owe me an apology.

Incomplete and hating every bit of it

I have been depressed lately. I have more than some, but I am not satisfied. I have my own place, I have a new car, I have a decent job, but I lack something. I lack fulfillment and completion. I am constantly at war with myself. I want to love, and I want to be loved. I want to work in an environment where people aren't constantly making you feel your job is at jeopardy. I know I do a good job, but people are more concerned with what I do outside of work, than to realize what all I do when I am here. I am just not happy. At this point of my life, I thought that I would at least have a serious relationship, marriage even. I am not even close. I don't need a man to be happy, but at the same time, I have so much love to give, and there is no one to give it to. I constantly find myself giving too much. I guess that men are just not in the place that I am mentally. It is either that, or they don't want to put in an equal amount. Why is it so hard? I used to want the intangible man, and as I have grown older, I realize that isn't the case anymore. I want someone that has their shit together. I want someone that is in a mind state where marriage and future is possible. Is that too much to ask? Let me get out of this rut a better person. I don't settle, but I really don't think I am asking too much. I am sure that he is out there somewhere. I am just tired of looking and tired of waiting. I guess that the saying "things happen when you least expect them to" may be the case. I am still trying to figure that out. I just don't want to be that old woman with 20 cats that dies alone. I think about that sometimes. I want children, and I shouldn't have to trap someone into getting hitched because I purposely got knocked up.

Lunch: a way to get pissed off daily

When it gets close to lunch, I always get pissed off. People at work decided that my boss and I can no longer be gone at the same time. By this, they mean even a slight overlapping of 5-10 minutes. Under most work conditions this wouldn't be an issue, but for me things are different. If my boss left at the same time everyday, things would be fine. If my boss didn't leave for an hour and a half everyday, I wouldn't care. My boss leaves whenever he feels like it and takes at least an hour and a half. Even if I tell him I have lunch plans at 1:30 PM, he will leave at 12:15 PM and not return until 1:45 PM having no regard for my lunch appointment. My friend, Boobies McBrune is always having to wait for me. My friend at work, Fuzzy McCootersnatch is usually having to wait for me too. I don't mind that my boss takes longer that everyone else, that doesn't bother me. What DOES bother me, is when I go up to him at 11:30 in the morning telling him to leave so he can be back at a decent time, he doesn't do it. I get to work before he does. So basically he gets here later than I do, he leaves for lunch before I do, and he takes a longer lunch than I do. Hmmmmm. How does this make and sense? Where does it add up? I try to be nice about it, but I am annoyed. If I am giving him a heads up on the time so he doesn't leave too late, he should know that I am not doing it because I care about his stomach, but the fact that I am hungry and need to eat before I transform into a total bitch. There are certain things that I have to have a certain way or I lose it.

1) Don't hang up on me.
2) When I am hungry, don't make me wait forever to eat. (My ex, Mayor's son found out the hard way........ He made me wait to eat, and when I finally ate, I threw everything up.)
3) Don't lie.
4) Don't cheat.

I told him to leave about an hour ago, and I still don't think he has made his way out the door yet. Why do I have to deal with the same shit everyday? I am tired of this place and their pathetic bullshit they call a business. Fuzzy McCootersnatch has seemed to see the light. She will be chunking the deuce very soon. Hell, I wouldn't mind dropping everything and hauling myself to a different location. Food for thought. Oh wait, I am waiting to go to lunch, there is no food for thought..... dick licks!!!

A happy start to a pissed off beginning

At the current moment there isn't anything wrong. I glance at the clock and see it is only 2:45PM; there is so much potential for things to get screwed up. After all, there are 9 hours and 15 minutes left before the day is over. I did get paid today....... That is a good thing. Let's see, what can I bitch about? Well, there are people at work that seem to thrive off making my life miserable. I was quoted today "Beware the ides of March" regarding Caesar Augustus. I think people here are plotting my assassination. It is so hard to keep up with everyone around here. I cannot make any promises that I will be pissed off everyday, but I can assure you I am more often pissed off than not.