Raw fish, beer, and balls

Fuzzy McCootersnatch took me to lunch today because it is her last day in this hell hole. We had raw fish, beer, and balls. I never had brown balls before; tapioca balls in my coffee that is! It is awesome. They are all chewy and gushy in your mouth, and a nice top off to the raw fish. Who knew that balls go so well after raw fish? I must admit I am a bit loony because we were drinking Japanese beer with our raw fish, and yes, before the balls. I need a nap now. I just wanted everyone to know about my lunch because I pulled an Italian Long-Lunch, like my boss does, and is named for. HA, that will show you!!!

All my exes live in Texas

I must start by saying that all of my exes do not live in Texas, but many of them do. I am so annoyed with the last one though. My last boyfriend and current ex, Middle School Midget annoyed the hell out of me. I shouldn't let it bother me, but it does, and I just can't help it. Of all of the people I have gone out with, I have known him the longest. We went to Middle School together. We have known one another for 15 years now. I cannot understand why Middle School Midget is so immature. He broke up with me in the beginning of January. He claimed that he wasn't happy with his life and what he was going to do with it, that is had nothing to do with me. He claimed that he was unable to make me happy if he himself was not happy. Mind you six days before he broke up with me we were at a bar called Sherlock's and I got upset because he was bragging to his friends on how much ass he got in college. The only reason that this bothered me is because I didn't want to hear about his past. I never ask questions regarding my significant others past because I do not care to know. There is no reason for me getting all jealous when it was before me, but at the same time I do not want it brought up in my presence. He could have told them that when I wasn't around, or when I was getting another round of drinks, because I of course was paying for the both of us. Well, that happened and I just walked away, went to the bar, and closed my tab. He came looking for me and what seemed to be honesty, told me that he didn't mean to make me upset, that he was happy with me, and he wasn't going anywhere. This was 6 days before he broke up with me. Well, lets fast forward to that point. He breaks up with me and tells me that he still wants to be friends and whatnot. I have no problem with that. I wasn't a bad break up (meaning no one fucked up), and for the most part, I am pretty good friends with most of my exes. We exchange a few emails after the break up, and he assures me we are still friends, although immediately taking down pictures of the two of us, and me off his top friends on MySpace, a place for friends. He did leave one picture though, which yesterday, nearly 3 months later I comment on it in a friendly manner. I wrote "do you ever look back and think of all the fun we had? Good times." and guess what he did? He didn't respond, he didn't acknowledge the comment, he erased the fucking picture. I know that he knew it was still there, because the day after he dumped me, he took one off of me kissing him (while he was on the phone...... go figure.) This was a funny picture and he took it off because I said something about it? Come on, grow the fuck up. We have known one another for 15 years; 15 fucking years. It is no surprise that he lives at his parents house and has no job. It is no shock to me that he plays video games all day. It doesn't make me blink twice that when he does actually make a little money, he wants to buy an Xbox 360 instead of thinking of how to get his own place and move out. Personally if I were him, I would feel bad for his mother, who told him she couldn't retire this year as planned because he was still living at home without a job. I guess he lacks motivation. He is a selfish fucking prick to want to try to go at it alone too. I was there beside him through every decision, be it good or bad, and he didn't care. He hasn't seemed to find it on his own either. He is still on MySpace everyday instead of looking for a job, or substitute teaching. It must be nice to not do shit, possibly work once every month, play video games, and have your phone, car insurance, food, and all expenses paid for. You are not on vacation fuck face, get a job and let your mom retire!!

I dreamed a dream

Last night I dreamt of the strangest things that I felt the need to write down the majority of what I remembered. I dreamt I was going to Eggland's Best's house. When I got there, I walked into his house and went looking for him. I went to his room, where I saw 2 people having sex in the dark. I went to pull them apart, and realized it was Garfunkel and Sherlock Woman having sex in Eggland's Best's bed, with him in it. They stopped doing it when I went over to Eggland's Best and asked him why they were doing it in his bed . I also asked why the hell he was just laying there on the opposite side while they were doing that. He said that Garfunkel went to get some protection from him and guess he didn't make it back to his room, that they just started going at it. This was so strange to me, even in a dream sequence. I think the part that made me realize something is that when I walked into the room initially, I thought it was Eggland's Best and some random woman, and I was jealous. This was not the case. When I look back on my dream, I was pissed at first, and when I saw the whole picture, I was relieved. I have to admit that it was strange that Garfunkel and Eggland's Best were hanging out, living together, or whatever. It was also strange to see Garfunkel going at it in Eggland's Best's bed with him in it. Later in the dream, Eggland's Best and I were hosting a party at his house. It was very weird. I don't know how this happened, but he was very open about our relationship. He was giving me kisses in front of people and all that. It was nice, and I liked it. I don't really remember much else of the dream, but I woke up and it was as if there was an entire montage that had occurred in the 9 hours I had laid myself down to sleep. Maybe I will remember more later. I'll get back to you all on this.

Why I started posting

I am not going to take back anything that I said in previous posts. I started this blog in order to let out my frustrations, and with that said, what was written describes how I felt at that particular time. I am not always bitter, pissed off, and annoyed, but I am easily affected by my surroundings. I do what I can to get over them, so if anyone is offended, that is not the purpose of this blog. The purpose is for me to deal with them the best way I can, and get over them in the manner I see fit. I hope this may clear up and questions or confusion. Please see this as my journey through life exposed for your reading pleasure. That is all.

Uninvolved: Tired of the drama

So, I talked to Fuzzy McCootersnatch today. I don't want to be mad at her anymore. I think I let things get to me that I just blow up, and other people that interfere don't make the situation any better. I don't mind my job. What does bother me, is that people are so consumed in every one's business, and it drives me nuts. It is so hard to keep up with all the bullshit, so why even let it get to me? Fuzzy McCootersnatch was the first person I connected to here, and I don't think things she may have said or done were intentionally done maliciously. She is a good person deep down, and as far as giving a damn about anyone here, she is the one that I actually care about. If I didn't care about her like this, I wouldn't get upset, or bothered, or enraged that I felt betrayed by her. She didn't even go to the party that was held by Jugs on Saturday. All this stink and no reason for it. I get my feelings hurt quite a bit, and honestly, why would I want to be somewhere when people don't want me there? I am tired of the drama. I just want to be happy. I just want other people to be happy, and I don't want people to pretend that they are here for me when they aren't. There is no need for that. I don't want to waste my time with someone if they really don't want to be friends with me. There is too much time for those that do, so why let it get to me? When times are rough, you know who your friends are. No matter how big or small an argument is, we all come around if we are both in the same place, and we both care. Like I said before, I don't want to be mad at her, because she is better than the rest of these douche nards.

Uninvited: a revoked invitation

Saturday I was supposed to go to a 5th annual house warming party. I called the hostess, Jugs to get directions. No answer. I left a message and told her to call me back because I didn't know how to get there. She called when I was showering to start getting ready for her party, so I told her I would call her back in a few minutes. I got out of the shower, and called Jugs again. When I had asked her how to get to her house, she told me that it would be best if I didn't come to the party after all. I asked why, but she didn't go into much detail. She said that I was spreading gossip about Fuzzy McCootersnatch and Derf, Jugs' boyfriend. I asked her what I allegedly had said, and she said that I have been spreading rumours that they have been having sex. I think that is funny, because coincidentally, Fuzzy McCootersnatch told me that Eggland's Best was spreading those rumours. I have no doubt in my mind that she in fact caused my invitation to be revoked. I just think she needs to grow up. She was telling me how she didn't want to say bad things about people anymore, that she didn't want to cuss, and wanted to start reading the Bible again. I think it is so messed up that she felt the need to do this. Just because we get into an argument over lunch on Friday, she has to start problems. She told Moley's Replacement (the new girl at work), about Eggland's Best and myself. My personal business is none of her concern. I told Fuzzy McCootersnatch out of friendship and trust, and she betrayed me. She acted like she was my friend, but she wasn't all along. I don't have any reason to say anything about Fuzzy McCootersnatch or Derf, so why in the hell would she say that? Why did she turn out to be two faced just like the lot of them? A wise person told me "That will teach you to tell your coworkers personal stuff. When you get old and wise like me, you would have this knowledge learned the hard way as you are now. This is the difference between friends by choice and friends by association. Just play stupid! That should be easy for you! You are a trained actor." Eggland's Best, you are right...... cheers to you.

I am not a piece of ass

So Friday night I went to sing karaoke with some of my friends. I ended up getting drunk and having a good time. A friend from work, Puerto Rican ended up calling me, so I had invited him to join in the singing and festivities. When I wanted to leave, he walked outside with me and suggested we go to his house. I was not interested in going to his house. I was drunk, tired, and wanted to go home. I asked him why he wanted to go to his house so bad, and he replied "so I can get some condoms." First off, he has a girlfriend. Secondly, I had no way implied that I would be taking him home with me to let him 'have his way with me'. I was drunk, but not that drunk. I thought I made that quite clear. He seemed to understand, but asked if he could follow me home. I guess he was worried about me getting home safely, or made it sound that way at any rate. We get to my house safely, and my phone rings. I answer it, it is Eggland's Best calling to come over. This pissed off Puerto Rican, because he walked out the door and drove off. I don't understand where he gets off thinking I am going to sleep with him. I was pissed, especially because I have been seeing Eggland's Best, and that is it. I called Puerto Rican on Saturday to give him the benefit of the doubt. I asked him why he stormed off, he was mad that I answered my phone when Eggland's Best rang. He also said that he didn't want to be friends with me. I guess this is because I didn't put out. That is insane. He needs to go call his girlfriend for that, I am not the work whore. I shouldn't have to sleep with someone to maintain a friendship with them, that is ridiculous. This is the place I work at. I shouldn't have to feel like I am in a day care center all day, and when it is time to get off, mommy is here to pick me up. For the love of God, I am not just a piece of ass. I have substance, and worth. Fuck you for thinking you could get in so easily, and Fuck you for giving into the stereotype of douche bag, ass hat men; boys for that matter.