Tuesday, July 15, 2008

I Put my Eggs on the Table

About 2 months ago I started inching away from Eggland's Best. He bought another car, which made me think his priorities were more skewed. I had come to the conclusion that he was not trying to proceed with a divorce if he was accumulating more assets.

I met a guy at a bar. I know that is so cliché, but we hit it off immediately. The way I met him was even more interesting.

I was sitting across the bar with Taco and we saw a group of hot guys directly across from us. We decided to send over 2 drinks to Guy 1 and Guy 2. After a while, I went over to the guys and told them that they were being douche bags for not coming over to say "thank you" to two pretty ladies for having bought them a beer. Guy 1 is Military Guy and that was the drink that Taco had sent over. Guy 2 was Police Guy that I had sent a drink to. Well, as it turns out, Police Guy was not THAT interesting and was all over some cougar in the bar. I started talking to another guy that was with Police Guy and Military Guy, I'll call him Florida Guy.

Florida Guy was very cute, and we seemed to have a lot in common. I don't typically try to pursue a relationship with a guy I meet in a bar, but here we are 2 months later, and for the most part, I have seen him everyday.

Florida Guy is my age (well, 8 months younger if you want to get technical). Florida Guy is very attractive. Florida Guy is NOT married and does NOT have kids. Florida Guy doesn't have any baggage.

We met up again the following day after having met one another. We ended up going to the same hole in the wall bar that we met at. I couldn't help thinking how funny or odd it was that I got him by sending his best friend a drink, but besides the point he was awesome. I definitely wanted to see him again.

Our first real date consisted of a sushi dinner at my favorite sushi place. I told him how I was pretty much obsessed with sushi and that I could eat him under the table. He then challenged me to eat sushi for two by myself. I accepted the challenge. After gorging myself with raw fish, we decided to go to the bar and have a drink before I went home. My car was at his house, so we drove there to pick it up beforehand because it was closer for me to go home from the bar than from his house. He invited me to come in his house because he had to relieve himself. On the first real date, I met his parents. They were very nice and welcoming.

2 months later I have found myself to be quite fond of Florida Guy. I have stayed at his house numerous times and slept in a twin size bed with the man. It is a squeeze, but comfortable at the same time. I guess it just gives us reason to cuddle up to one another. I see him nearly everyday and that makes me very happy. All this being said, my likeness for Eggs has slowly faded.

After having devoted myself to the intangible Egg for a year and a half I found myself feeling that I would miss an opportunity for something substantial and readily available. I felt that I would miss out on something potentially wonderful by waiting for something that MIGHT not ever be, and I didn't want to do that. After having been in The Garden State for over a year now, I have not once before Florida Guy given the time of day to anyone, and now, all of a sudden, I am smitten and wanting more to come. I felt that I needed to put an end to my long distance lover, and move on with my life. I felt that I would never know how things would turn out with Florida Guy and myself, if I didn't give it my all. This being said, I put my eggs on the table, literally. I gave up on love in pursuit of a new potential love, one that was readily available. I didn't want to be on the back burner any longer. I still don't know what may come with Florida Guy, but I am quite excited to see. I know that he makes me happy, and right now, that is all I can ask for.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Update: Smoking vs Divorce

I am still smoking.

He is still married.

The end.

I have been wondering if this is just a huge waste of my time. It has been nearly a year and a half, and he has been separated for 2 years before I came along.

Is he ever going to do it, and if so, is he going to want to marry me?

Saturday, February 23, 2008

The Chronicles of Wah-Wah, Part IV

washing plastic, vinyl, latex and rubber items before and after every use

Make sure you buy your Mighty Tidy
for the one and only, the Almighty.
Clean him well and have spin
no matter what, you ALWAYS win.
Pheromones can't do it all
sometimes it works, but dicks are small.
Go with what you know and trust
before you spontaneously combust.
No need to figure out the guy
or the package between the thighs.
I have a dresser for times like these
that is filled with everything I need.
The toys, the attachments, and the cleanser
wow, it is like this thing has a sensor!
A few more seconds, then I'm done
Osaki is still my number one.
I went to a party and was put in a strap
my coworker as well with my ass there to tap.
They asked me to sell cause I knew all the stuff
but I'd go in debt, knowing my luck.
I would sell so many, I'd lose my count
but I would also buy, so there's my discount!
I must admit it would be fun
to make sure every woman on earth had one.

passion party

Smoking vs Divorce

quit smoking

I talked to Eggs on the way home from babysitting tonight, and when I pulled into my driveway I was still smoking my cigarette. I told him this and he said....

"I wish you would stop smoking."

I simply replied with this "I wish you would get divorced."

"Touché."

"How about I quit smoking when you get divorced?"

Needless to say, I put an end to that discussion....

divorce

Friday, February 1, 2008

Suki and her new shoes

Ok, so since I have lived in NJ I have spent $1,300 on wheels and tires for my car. That is nearly as much as what I paid the movers to move my entire apartment 1,700 miles.

When I was driving here from Texas, I noticed that a tire was peeling at the side wall. I then inspected all of my tires and at the end of it all, there were 3 that were doing this. I figured this wasn't safe, but I couldn't do much about it until I was out of transit and where I needed to ultimately end up. When I got here, I went to a tire place and found out that my tires were defective.

A little over $500 later, I contacted a Nankang tire distributor with the help of my friends at the tire place I purchased my new tires. With their help, I managed to get a measly $40 per tire from the distributor for the defects.

About a week or so ago I hit a huge pothole in the road. I didn't think to much about it, because they happen to be EVERYWHERE in this fucking state. Later on I realized that one of my tires had a huge piece of rubber hanging off of the tire and a huge scratch in my rim.

*Each rim on my car is approximately $500 to replace.

I went to the tire place again and we went ahead and ordered a new tire. The guy there told me that there was a possibility that the rim might be damaged on the inside, but there was no way to know until we took the tire off and went to replace the new one; the tire took a day to come in. He then informed me that if this happened to be the case, he would put the spare on and we would go from there. I went in the following day expecting to pay for the tire, and guess what? When they went to take the tire off, they showed me a huge crack in the rim. They then also suggested that instead of replacing one rim for $500, I go with a whole new set of rims for just a little over the price of the one my car currently had on. He then showed me that the rear rim was also scratched due to the same pothole, but it was still in decent condition.

I decided to go with four new rims for $600 instead of the same rim I had on the car for $500 a pop. They were similar rims, but much cheaper. Instead of four rims at $500 each, I went for four brand new non-scratched rims for $150 a piece.

I had to order these rims and wait until they were in, therefore I was driving on the spare tire until they came in. I went in yesterday and they are all fixed and looking quite good. I left the place paying a little over $750, but at least they are all brand new and looking pretty sharp.

In eight months, I have spent $1300 in wheels and tires. That is approximately $162.50 a month I could have spent on something better. I feel that the state should pay me back for their negligence of the road conditions, but I am sure any attempt to call them will accomplish nothing. I think I would be better off talking to a brick wall and making friends with it. I do, however find it ironic that the pothole has miraculously been patched up. I wonder if I was not the only one to have to suck it up and spend the extra money to ensure my safety. I also wonder if something bad happened to me in that week of me driving around on an unsafe tire and a damaged rim if there would be a way to prove that it were due to unsafe roads. What would have come out of it? What if i didn't notice the tire and never knew about the rim?

The roads here suck, and I can't believe how people neglect them where they can get THAT bad. The pothole was so big and deep it were as if one side of my car went diving into a huge ditch and came out all scratched up.

The pothole was unavoidable as well. It was on a narrow bridge going to my house from work, and if someone is coming the other way, you can't do anything about it. I guess the phrase "wrong place at the right time" could be modified to "wrong place all the time"...... until it was fixed I suppose.

Anyway, Suki has a brand new pair of shoes now...... these better be nicer to her or I may have to cut someone. I do not anticipate having to make any purchases with tires and wheels for a long time to come!!!

BMW 243 wheel 5 spoke

*this is not my rim, but it is 5 spoke, therefore somewhat similar.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

The Bipolar Woman

Ok, so I haven't written in a while and figure this would be a great time to start back and a great story to kick off the new year.

I think I started babysitting for The Bipolar Woman in November. This was short lived, obviously. I soon came to realize that this woman is indeed a crazy bitch and on top of that one who uses alcohol to self medicate, in other words a fucking alcoholic.

Let me give you a little background on The Bipolar Woman. She is 29 years old and has 2 children. One is 3 1/2 and the other is 9. She only has custody of the 3 1/2 year old. The Bipolar Woman has never been married, and both children are from different fathers. It wasn't until recently I found out that not only does she not have custody of the 9 year old, he is not even allowed to go in her house. That being said, on the weekends he comes to visit her The Bipolar Woman's mom picks him up in Connecticut and drives him to her house where he stays for the weekend. Mom visits him there. The Bipolar Woman is a waitress at a restaurant in town and doesn't drive or own a car.

To get to the part where I decide not to babysit for this crazy bitch anymore, will lead us to the last week in December. The Bipolar Woman calls me at 11:35 in the morning asking me if I were available to babysit that day. I said that I was and asked what time she needed me there. She informs me that I am needing to be at her house at 12, which leaves me with 10 minutes to get out of bed and wash up and 15 minutes to get to her house. I informed her that it would have been nice to know this earlier or the day before even, but she assures me that she had just recently found out that she was needed to come into work. I say yes to the situation and bust my ass in order to get there on time.

My phone rings again at 11:43......

Her Fuck Buddy is on the other end of the line. I assumed he was calling me to see where I was and having 2 minutes left before I was to leave the house I just spurted out "Tell her I will be there at 12, and to quit fucking calling me!"

He informs me that she asked him to call because she had JUST found out that she didn't need to work.

I find this incredibly ironic because only 8 minutes prior she was calling me telling me she JUST found out that she had to work and that is why I was not given prior notice.

At this point I am pissed. Not only did I get my ass out of bed after having stayed at a coworkers house until nearly 3 in the morning drinking wine, but I hurried to shower and brush my teeth for what, NOTHING?

I tell her Fuck Buddy to tell her that she is ridiculous and went off about how she woke me up and made me do everything at the speed of light for nothing. I then tell him that the next time she has something negative to say, she should fucking have the guts to call me her damn self. I hung up the phone.

At the point there is no need for me to get back in bed. Hell, I showered, brushed my teeth, and got dressed in 8 minutes. That kind of rush kind of wakes you up, don't you think?

My phone rings again at 11:57 AM..... It is HER.

I answer the phone and she starts in telling me how sorry she is and how she would like to take me to lunch to make up for it. I agree because as I said before, I was not about to get back in bed. I told her I would leave my house and meet her at her house.

We go to lunch. My coworker calls me and tells me that she is heading up to the school, and having not fed my frog in a week, I told her I would meet her up there. I asked The Bipolar Woman and her Fuck Buddy to box the rest of my food and I would either A) call when i was done to see if they were still at the restaurant, or B) meet them wherever they were for my food.

I go to the school.

My phone rings again...... It is HER again.

I answer the phone and she lets me know that they are leaving the restaurant, but that Fuck Buddy has my food and I can just call him when I am done to pick it up or meet him somewhere.

She had to work the night shift and during lunch she asked me if I wanted to babysit for the nighttime. I was already irate so I said no, but I had also made plans to take my brother and sister to see Alvin and the Chipmunks. She said not to worry about it and that she would have her mom sit for her daughter.

I finish at the school and call her Fuck Buddy. He tells me that we can meet back up at the restaurant where we ate and that he would buy me a drink. I let him know that I was going to find out the movie times and then I would meet him there.

The Bipolar Woman sees us leaving the restaurant and him handing me my food. She immediately starts text messaging him saying "I guess she couldn't babysit tonight because she was too busy having cocktails with you" and other things of the sort.

Fist off, I have the fucking movie tickets to prove that I went with my siblings, however I do not feel I have to justify myself to her. Secondly, SHE called ME telling me that HE had my food. If she had a huge problem with him giving me my leftovers, she could have easily said "I have your leftovers, you can come pick it up whenever you get a chance because you have a key to my house". She isn't the most rational or smartest people in the world. And Thirdly, It would be different if I was making out with her Fuck Buddy, but he was HANDING ME MY FUCKING FOOD!!!!

Now you tell me, would YOU babysit for this crazy bitch after that?